When Lester & Charlie need clear-headed advice, they turn to chain-smoking deep-thinker Aunt Betty. Soak up her wisdom and feel free to ask her your own questions!
On religion:
"Sitting in a church isn't going to make me any more religious than sitting in a garage would make me a Ford."
On Karl Rove:
"I don't believe in the death penalty, but I'll stay alive just to see if that jackass might get it."
On visiting her son in Wichita:
"I can't believe I'm going to a state of our Union where the majority of so-called citizens think that 'Creationism' is a logical concept. I don't know what I'm going to do."
On Harriet Miers, momentary Bush nomination to the Supreme Court:
"I heard her say that George Bush is the most intelligent person she knows. That should disqualify her from the human race, not just the race for the court."
On Phoenix:
"Luckily, the weather is so bad that I'll probably stay in doors and won't meet anybody."
On illegal immigration:
"I don't want Mexicans coming into this country at all. They're clearly taking the only jobs that American's are capable of doing."
On her stroke:
"Somebody had to upset about it. When I saw how stressed out the doctors were, I figured I was off the hook."
On people:
"God made more horses asses than he made horses."
Do You Have an Issue that Aunt Betty can Resolve?
Enter it below and if she gives a crap, we'll publish the answer!
Yes, Aunt Betty is a real person. The photo above is a fake to protect her identity.
